As we approach the end of the year, there’s so many things on our minds. Many of us are planning holiday parties or get togethers. Many are wondering what to gift, make, or how they’ll spend their time. And often we think about changes we want to make in our lives. The end of the year really makes us sit and think about things ending, changing, or transitioning. Of course it can make us excited or hopeful but these transitions can also be stressful.

Why Do Transitions Feel So Stressful?

The short answer is that we don’t really love change, even if change is good for us. It can be difficult to go from thinking about something one way to then thinking about it a new way. It takes time to adjust to that and it can be stressful, depending on what it is. And if the changes we’re implementing come with new routines or schedules, that can make things even more difficult for us.

We love patterns. It’s how our brains evolved to work and finding patterns in things makes us comfortable. There’s safety in knowing what’s going to happen next. If it’s a transition we weren’t expecting or had no choice over, it can add a feeling of helplessness and loss of control that makes it difficult to cope. This can cause some serious anxiety when thinking about the transition or changes that are coming.

What Kind of Transitions Can Affect Us?

Technically, anything that brings change to our lives can affect us and stress us out. Moving, changing jobs, having a baby, and getting married tend to be the big ones that people think about. But consider how for children, the end of the year signals the end of a school semester. For some of them, it means potentially not having friends in any of their classes when the new semester starts. Maybe it means a new teacher they’re never met before. Even though these things aren’t necessarily bad, they can absolutely affect someone’s mental health.

Making changes to our health can also cause stress. Maybe you’re cutting back on caffeine. Some people experience withdrawals from this that can be pretty unpleasant, including headaches. It also means a change in your routine of not going to the coffee shop as often or making something different in the morning to drink at home. These are little things that can add up if you’re already struggling with other things.

Is There Anything We Can Do?

We can’t avoid change, not forever. Change is good for us in the long run even if it doesn’t feel good at the moment. Some stress management techniques can help in the moment for dealing with these uncomfortable feelings. We’ve explored some of these techniques in a previous post about grounding techniques. These can be used if you feel overwhelmed or very anxious due to these changes.

Another option is to talk to someone you trust. Leaning on social supports during times of transition can be especially helpful. They often understand the impact these things can have on you and are likely to be able to support you through tough transitions. They can be there to remind you of the reasons this will be good in the end and they can also help you cope.

However, if talking to a loved one doesn’t help, consider reaching out to a therapist. Many people go to therapy just to help cope with transitions and changes. It can help to get someone neutral to chime in on what’s going on and to help listen to you.

Change doesn’t have to be difficult to cope with long term and there are options out there for help dealing with them. But do remember that it’s normal to struggle with change and that it’s normal to be anxious during these moments.